Saturday, August 20, 2011

On the tv: "Maestro"...oh, oh, oh

Those three "oh, oh, oh's" in the headline are meant to illustrate an echo; meaning the vapid, emptiness a concept show like "Maestro" will leave behind.
(Here's a link to a danish newspaper article about it...all hail Google translate!)

At this point, of course, I am making harsh, irrational predictions, since the show has not yet aired on danish television. But based on the concept and the participants, I am so full of dread.

I don't see any justification for this show, other than the participants, judges and presenters getting more television-time. Honestly.
  • Would you invite 6 random people to stand in front of an orchestra and play the Tschaikovsky violin-concerto?
  • Would you make a television program about 6 random people designing and constructing a 10 story building?
  • Would you film 6 random people with no knowledge of mathematics trying to write a mathematical solution?
  • Would you invite 6 monkeys to paint and exhibit at the National Gallery? YES, that would be GREAT and hopefully include a lot of pictures of bananas!!
  • As my brother who has just returned from Afghanistan wrote: would you make a program about 6 random people fighting a war?
  • Would it make sense to construct a television program, that seemingly combines the mysterious aura of the arcane, dark art of conducting with the allure of the celebrity world and project this onto the seemingly hilarious, slapstick shenanigans of working in a very costly, prestigious, cultural institute such as the Danish Radio Symphony Orchestra?
The sensible answers to the questions above are "No", "No", "No", "YES BANANAS", "No" and "No".
Unless you are a television executive - or otherwise involved in this 'intriguing' program - then the answers are "Yes", "Yes", "Yes, "Yes and who can I pay a lot of money for this briliant idea", "Yes" and "Yes".

The conducting 'fach' has now apparently no integrity, just like professional dancing and cooking. Hooray.

 "Oh, but Mr. Nordin, how can you be so negative?"
Because, that's my gut reaction. I hope to have it reversed when I watch the first episode of "Maestro". Then I will write a blogpost about how wrong I was, I promise. Oh, wait! If I watch it, then I will just be another pawn in their evil masterplan! A puppet, dancing on a string! Help me, I'm caught in a paradox!

P.S. When I say "random", I mean celebrities. Celebreties are people who have deviced a clever plan (possible including the collection of underpants) to be seen as much on television as possible.


Anonymous said...

Are these budding maestros going to explain to the audience and judges their approach to the piece of music they will conduct? Its meaning within the period it was composed, its architecture etc, before conducting. I very much doubt it.

Next subject for a programme: Who lands a Boeing 747 better.....

Joe Mavi said...

They did a similar program in the UK last year. I saw a bit of the first episode.It was, well, pathetic.
Likely to be the same in your country. You'll see lots of well intentioned people waving a stick and the orchestra doing random chaotic sounds to make everybody laugh. If I remember well, Norrington was a judge. Not sure if it was a popular program or not.

Jesper L. S. Nordin said...

I'll be interested to see if the orchestra actually plays like the participants conduct. I doubt they will, since they're such a great band and have a lot of pride of course.
When that's said...they have been used to ignoring the conductor and just producing great concerts on their own for many years actually, so this might not be different...

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If you could magically create your dream conductor, but he/she could only posess one quality, he/she should preferably be...